From Self-Published to a Three-Book Deal: the Story Behind Self Love Poetry

Ten years ago, I sent my first book to 75 agents and publishers. This time, the publisher came to me. My latest book Self Love Poetry: For…

Ten years ago, I sent my first book to 75 agents and publishers. This time, the publisher came to me. My latest book Self Love Poetry: For Thinkers & Feelers is set to be published by Andrews McMeel Publishing on Tuesday, October 5th.

I started my career as a litigation attorney (a far cry from my current career as a poet — stay with me). When I hit my one year mark as a lawyer, a few things were abundantly clear to me: I was really good at it, I was on the cusp of a mental breakdown, and when I looked at all the people ahead of me in line, I didn’t aspire to becoming any of them. I knew if I didn’t get out right away, I would stay forever — because who wouldn’t? Prestige, incredible pay, a 20th floor office with an ocean view, wonderful colleagues, important cases… The problem was there was a complete disconnect between this line of work and my purpose as a human: which is to be creative and collaborative. My short career in law didn’t allow for either — and my mental state was getting worse by the day because of it.

I gave notice on October 2nd, explaining to my managing partner that I had a book to write. A month later at the beginning of November, I along with thousands of others around the world set out to write a novel in 30 days. I didn’t have an outline. I didn’t really have a clue. Just an inkling of an idea about a Beverly Hills talent agent who was actually an undercover CIA agent, with the goal of exploring the intersection of entertainment and politics in a fun, thriller setting (I was very much ahead of my time). I wrote about 1200 words a day, never knowing where I would start and where I would end. It was exhilarating. The book just poured out of me. Every ounce of creativity that had been hibernating during my three years of law school and year as an attorney came to the surface. At the end of 30 days I had a 50,000 word first draft of The Agency, the book that was going to get me an agent, a book deal, a movie deal, and a new life as an acclaimed author.

Spoiler alert: none of that happened.

The book was good. But no one wanted it. Not one of the 75 agents or publishers I sent it to even gave it a second look. I was crushed. But not so crushed that I didn’t want my book out there. So I quietly self published using CreateSpace, a now defunct platform that was absorbed by Amazon and became KDP (Kindle Direct Publishing). Like many first-time, self-published authors, I had no clue what I was doing. I didn’t hire a professional proofreader or editor (big mistake). I designed a cover with a friend, and then changed it within a month when I realized it wasn’t attention-grabbing enough on Amazon. I didn’t do any marketing or advertising. I published, but with a lot of shame. I wasn’t proud of self publishing, so I put it up and moved on with my life.

I continued writing by starting a writing agency in 2010 that later evolved into a successful resume writing company. Five years later I started a second company, this time a self love movement called Fred and Far powered by the Self Love Pinky Ring, a ring I designed to remind women to be, choose and love themselves — daily. Even though I was running two successful businesses, my heart still longed for what I craved when I left the law: a creative outlet — my writing.

What started as a series of newsletters about self love became my next book, The ABCs of Self Love (which is getting a beautiful update as book two of my three-book deal). This time I didn’t even try to get a publisher. I had an established community through Fred and Far that loved my content, so I self-published the book for them and gave it away on Black Friday 2018. It still didn’t cement my identity as an author, but it got me closer. Holding that book made me realize — just as the first draft of The Agency did — that this is what I was meant to do. I continued. I began writing poetry on Instagram nearly every day to bring both my self love movement, and my true self to life. In 2019, I took six months off my businesses and created space for myself to explore what it felt like to be in my body, in my mind, in my real-time experience not as an entrepreneur, but as a creative human. The work that flooded out of me was some of the best writing I had ever done. With each passing year since I left the law, one thing was becoming certain: the more space I created for my true self — the writer in me — the happier I would be, and the more meaningful my impact.

On February 29th, 2020, I went to the Oprah Vision Tour in Los Angeles with my mom, who had purchased the tickets months earlier as a surprise treat for us. Sitting in a stadium of over 10,000 women, watching Oprah ask us what our purpose is, I knew what I had to do: there was a poetry book in me — and it was time to write it. It took me two months to figure out exactly what the book should be. At first, in reviewing the lifetime of poetry I’ve written, I couldn’t make sense of how to organize it. My writing styles could be so disparate at times. But on May 1st, 2020, I wrote my assistant at the time this email:

I’ve been mulling over a poetry book for months and finally figured it out: Self Love Poems for Thinkers and Feelers. Left side of the book will appeal to the left brain — more logical thinkers, right side to right brain — more emotional. Snappy matter of fact advice poems vs more lyrical emotional ones.

Thoughts?

Thankfully she thought it was a good idea. Together we spent the next six months creating a book — 100 pairs of poems, each on a central theme related to self love. The left side for left-brain thinkers, the right side for right-brain feelers. The book came together so easily I couldn’t help but feel it was meant to be.

When it came time to publish I knew I wanted to self publish again, but this time I did it differently. I didn’t see it as a second class option, or as something I was doing for my existing community. I researched book covers that did well in my genre. I read about choosing keywords and categories carefully on Amazon. I learned about Amazon ads and launch strategies. When my publication date in October of 2020 arrived, I boldly asked everyone I know to buy a copy — or five. And this time, something extraordinary happened — the book became an instant bestseller and best new release.

Within a month, a publisher reached out to me. Six months later, we negotiated a three-book deal. My self-published version of Self Love Poetry remained in the top 5000 books on Amazon throughout its time online. It garnered over 800 ratings and reviews and maintained a near perfect five star rating. It remained a bestseller in several categories until I took it down to make way for the new version. It was named one of the best poetry books of 2021. Amazon even interviewed me about it. In short, it honored the step I took in 2009 when I left the law and chose myself instead. It took over 10 years, but it was worth it. In November of 2020, one of my poems from Self Love Poetry even went viral — achieving billions of views for capturing the collective feeling of the pandemic holiday season: “I thought 2020 would be the year I got everything I wanted. Now I know 2020 is the year I appreciate everything I have.” Which Instagram account shared it first? Oprah Magazine. Did you get chills? I still do.

This Tuesday, the new edition of Self Love Poetry gets released. But this time, it’s not just on Amazon: it will be in bookstores around the country, and hopefully soon around the world. My success as always depends on you, and all the people like you who have believed in me and empowered me to get to where I am today. So even if you’ve already purchased the original version, I hope you’ll buy the new one. Because this version is proof that when you believe in and invest in yourself, the world will follow suit.

You can order Self Love Poetry wherever books are sold, but here are some important links for you: Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Indie Bound, Bookshop, Books A Million. Thank you for your support — message me if you need mine.

Resources for authors:

Bryan Cohen — Take his free, five-day Amazon Ad Profit Challenge to learn how to run ads on Amazon for your books
Publisher Rocket — For selecting your Amazon categories 
KDP — The simplest way to get your book on Amazon, for free
Book Cover Archive — My favorite place for book cover inspiration
MelodyGodfred.com — Where you can find the latest details about me and stay connected