Self love is... choosing the pattern

Preorder Moon Garden from The Strand and get a celestial free gift!

A poem from my new book, Moon Garden: Poetry for Manifestation, now available for preorder at The Strand in New York City (with a free preorder gift!).

Albert Einstein once wisely said, “Without changing our pattern of thought, we will not be able to solve the problems we created with our current patterns of thought.” Tonight, while trying to convince my preteen to want to like to eat vegetables, I found myself saying something similar. “Your mind controls your body, Stella,” I said to her, sounding — I’m sure — to her like an absolute lunatic (a word I’m reclaiming by the way). “If you think you’re going to like the vegetables, your taste buds are more likely to agree.” My God. What we become as we hit mid-life as adults. We become the very lunatics we used to roll our eyes at when we were young. I distinctly remember The Secret coming out in my early twenties and thinking to myself, “Anyone who buys this mumbo jumbo is nuts.” Now at nearly 43, I find myself saying, “Lucky girls find parking,” and believing I’ll find parking because of it. The thing is, when I say it, I do.

Our greatest pattern that controls our lives is our pattern of thought. I know this unequivocally. And while you may not be sure whether changing your thoughts can literally change the course of your reality (the way I’ve come to believe) you can at the very least concede that changing your thoughts may change the way you feel about your life. Without changing the facts, could you be more joyful about your life? I believe it is possible. And it starts with your thoughts.

Is this toxic positivity? Not in the least. Because there is room for deep sorrow in this equation, especially right now given the state of the world. We’re not talking about feelings here. We’re talking about thoughts. What do you spend your time thinking about? In your thoughts, do things spiral down and out of control, or are you ascending? In your mind, is there room for an uncertain future that is bursting with possibility, or has fear sucked all the air out of the room and left you with nothing but perilous tunnel vision? It comes down to making a choice: do you want to be heavy, or do you want to be light? What thought pattern allows you to move through the world a little more freely? Self love wants you to pick that one.

A poem from my new book, Moon Garden: Poetry for Manifestation, now available for preorder at The Strand in New York City (with a free preorder gift!).

Back to Stella, my preteen thought experiment guinea pig. Did she buy into my strategy? Not in the least. She is so rooted in her current reality of hating vegetables that she nearly threw up on her third bite. Was I angry? I was surprisingly calm. Because I too am choosing my thoughts. And the thought I’m clinging to most tightly right now as a parent is this one: This has nothing to do with me. And it’s true: whether she eats vegetables or not is ultimately up to her, and the natural consequence that will follow is hers, too. My job is to gently nudge her in the right direction and keep opening the door of her mind to new ideas and pathways to greater health, love, joy, and adventure. Did we walk through the door tonight? I wish. But will we in the future? I have no doubt. The future is bright, because that’s how I choose to think about it.

What thought pattern is bringing you down right now? How can you reframe it?

What thought pattern is lifting you up right now? How can you expand it?

XO,

Melody (your resident lunatic)

PREORDER MOON GARDEN FROM THE STRAND IN NYC AND GET A FREE GIFT!

I’m beyond grateful to partner with iconic independent bookstore The Strand in NYC, a long-time supporter of my books, to offer signed preorder copies of Moon Garden: Poetry for Manifestation that come with a special, limited edition glow-in-the-dark sticker sheet with some of my favorite poems from the book. Use the preorder link below to get yours! Thank you for supporting independent bookstores and me. <3